偷偷藏不住的爱

Have you ever fallen in love at first sight and not been able to confess for a long long time

I’m a hopeless romantic & a sucker for love stories.
Give me a love story, I’ll read it from start to finish.

The songs I've been using in this and the last photo come from the OST of a RomCom based on a love story I finished reading on Monday in 1 day.
It’s a story where the two protagonists try to hide their love for each other for the longest time

The choice of the actor and actress are so cunning & apt that they seem like they walked straight outta the book pages.
Especially the lead actor, I’m often so impressed by how he carried himself literally exactly as the character was described in the book: 
“模样冷淡慵懒” 
“眼含春色，玩世不恭，温和却又疏远，
吊儿郎当，却又细心温柔到极致”,
“清瘦高大，黑发朗眸，出众过艳的五官，
站在光亮之处，显得夺目又张扬”
Especially in the latest episodes, the new “铁树开花版 段嘉许” 
On Weibo, for the last few days,
there are quite a few Hot Search hashtags about this character, 
where people described this period of the story as #段嘉许孔雀开屏 #男狐狸精本人
​
I love this current dynamic between 桑稚 & 段嘉许, before & while he 摊牌.
In the book it was sweet to read but they are after all just black & white words on book pages.

in live action, the actors delivered the birthday scene so well,
even I felt the hard-to-Breathe TENSION that the characters were experiencing.

In live-action, 
Moments get stretched, camera is on close-up, cutting between the 2 protagonists,
music is in the background building the atmosphere, 
you can see the actors’ facial expressions and body language.
In my opinion, the tension in the 曖昧 period is the Best part of a relationship.
It’s like arriving in a new country, learning the ways of the city, navigating it, discovering all the possibilities.

I’ve read many books that have been adapted into live-action in the last few years.
​All of them are love stories, of course~.
Many of them have characters that have hidden love for their counterparts.
But This one is the sweetest and the lightest in mood and weight. 
I love the timeless bond the writer set up between 桑稚 & 段嘉许,
I especially appreciate the unconditional care and attentiveness they have for each other.

When he asked her, what are the requirements you have for someone you would like to be pursued by?
He asked these questions as a way to probe her interest on him, which he already discovered.

But really, these are requirements that every one should have a standard on for everyone else in their life:
Partner, friends, coworkers, classmates, roommates. 
Who would you allow to continue to exist in your life?
Do you have a standard and a reasonable expectation of others, for your own self-care?
I feel many people do not necessarily have that rule of thumb about people,
because they may not have a standard for themselves, even.
For me, I love looking out for my friends where I can,
so the qualities I need in friends and neighbors and coworker-become-friends etc are along similar lines, 
If I don’t receive the same kind of attentiveness or attention from someone,
then I would not reach out and give them any more attention, period.
If someone doesn’t make contact with me,
then I won’t make contact with them either.
Because life is all about give-and-take, and a decent amount of self-love.

These are the questions I ask for myself / for my friends when it comes to any kind of people-evaluation in life:

• Do they make the effort to look out for me/my friend?
• Do they follow through with their actions?
  (Don’t listen to what they say, look at what they do.) i.e. Are they consistent?
• Do they often think things through from my/my friend’s perspective?
• Can they take care of me/my friend in the little things in daily life?
• Do they anticipate my/my friend’s needs and look after my/my friend’s feelings when I’m/they’re feeling upset?
• Have they demonstrated that they would be there for me/my friend when needed?
• Have they shown that they are able to look after my/my friend’s family and friends when I’m/they’re not around?
• Do they cook well / can bring healthy food around when I don’t/my friend doesn’t feel like cooking at all?
• Are they humble?
• Do they focus on self-improvement and keep a journal/take time for self-reflection?

I really feel that everyone should evaluate themselves and others this way.
I know none of us are perfect,
and there are many days where we simply are not well enough to spare the mindspace to look after someone.
But I feel we also shouldn’t give too much if the other party simply does not demonstrate that they reciprocate in equal measure.
I worry that my friends may sacrifice their own peace for someone who isn’t worth it.

I hope all my friends are well cared for in their lives by others, 
and that they have people that would look after them and look out for them the way 段嘉许 & 桑稚 would look after each other.
Theirs should be the basic standard.